Happiness is a myth, yet we all seek it in a relationship. But there is nothing wrong with expecting a positive feeling when you love someone. However, things will change if your partner is not the one he claims to be. So, that is when things fall apart. Of course, no one likes to be in a bad phase in life, but what if you are stuck in a relationship that is emotionally draining? Should you be living a pathetic life forever? Or should you call it quits and move on to start a better future?
The answer is clear- You Live Only Once. So, quit what is pulling you down and embrace what is helping you grow. Obviously, it will never be easy to start a life on a happy note if you are still tied to the shackles of society’s unwritten rules. But if you think the other way, ask yourself, when you were depressed, was society there to console you? Then, when you want to make changes in your life to make it better, why think of society?
Always remember- No one really cares. No one is interested in your life. It is your life, and you must make the rules for yourself.
Now, if you are at a stage where life looks impossible, then check out the signs that will help you in learning when you should call it quits.
1. You are playing the role of a mom to your partner
Yes, many men behave childishly. They don’t care about others’ feelings. I don’t know if that is an inherent psychological trait or if they do it purposely. But yes, there comes a time when you become a parent to your partner, where he messes up the place, keeps things dirty, and does not value your efforts.
And what do you do? All you do is keep asking your partner to keep the place neat and clean up the mess, and then you jump into bickering about how he treats you. While all this continues, your partner still doesn’t learn, he is supposed to improve himself at becoming mature and rectifying his mistakes. That is when you should call it quits.
2. You are the only responsible person in the relationship
Yes, money plays a major role in every relationship. Even if you want to ignore the monetary aspect and keep your lovey-dovey feelings high, you will regret it big time in the near future. If you are the only one who takes the relationship responsibilities seriously, then I guess you should be in a relationship with yourself.
Why do you need an indolent partner who doesn’t care about his future? Take a stand and move out. You are born to enjoy and live a life of your choice. Don’t carry the burden of raising a man-child. If he doesn’t see anything wrong in his behavior, let him be. You call it quits.
3. The relationship has turned toxic
You should never tolerate any kind of abuse from your partner. Neither should you be abusing your partner. A relationship turns toxic when there is negativity and no affection for each other.
If you are living with a man just to be in a relationship, then you are losing on the potential partners with whom you can actually live happily. An abusive partner or a toxic relationship can take a toll on your mental health. So, it is best you call it quits before you slip into depression.
4. You get anxious more often
This one has a link to the point mentioned above. A bad or unhealthy relationship can never help in your personal growth. You will gradually slip into depression if you stay with a man who doesn’t care for you.
Love, trust, and respect bind you in a relationship. But if one of these pillars goes missing, your relationship starts collapsing. That is when you get anxious and stressed about your married life or live-in relationship. You can prevent depression if you take the right steps at the right time.
Protecting your mental health means wisdom. If people call you selfish, let them continue. No one will come to your rescue except for your parents or close friends if you slip into depression. Bestow your trust on your loved ones.
5. You mull over the thoughts- you both are made for each other
You should never be rigid with your thoughts. That’s because people change and so do their thinking processes. So, as time flies by, the feeling that your partner had for you before can fade away due to some situations.
It is not that you can’t rebuild the foundation, but if you keep thinking you both are only made for each other and hence you should stick together forever, may not work in your favor. Stop over-thinking and get practical. If things aren’t working, it means something is wrong. Call it quits; take the charge, and build a better life for yourself.
6. You see no future together
In the initial days of the relationship, we all make plans for the future. Of course, some plans come to fruition, while others stay pending. But if in your relationship, it is only you who has been making efforts to make your relationship flourish so that your future stays bright and beautiful, then you should think about it again.
Maybe, it is time you call it quits because you don’t see your partner contributing to your relationship. Also, do not get confused between stagnation and no growth. Both are different in relationship terms. In stagnation, you are happy and complacent in the relationship. Whereas no growth refers to growing differences between each other and prolonged fights.
7. When you realize he is cheating on you
Cheating is an excuse that you should never forgive. Once a cheater, always a cheater- remember that. Yes, people change and overcome their bad habits, but some inherent traits never wash away.
So, if your man has been cheating on you and you catch him red-handed, what should you be doing? Get rid of this man, simple as that. What guarantees that he won’t cheat on you again? So, if you wish to avoid all the mental trauma, better move out of the relationship amicably.
8. You have realized that your feelings have faded away- Call it quits!
No love means no happy relationship. It is merely a bond that has no affectionate attachment. So, why stay in such a relationship? I agree people who are in their 40s or 50s tend to believe that if they break up now, how will they find new love again?
It seems difficult to find the right life partner after a certain age. But, why stay in a relationship where you are not happy and living a miserable life? Isn’t that reason good enough to move out and be happy with yourself?
You have to remember one thing- you come alone in this world and you will part alone. Relationships must bring joy and happiness, not suffering. If you or your partner have lost feelings for each other, then better look for love elsewhere. Or better start loving yourself, even more, you don’t need anybody to stay happy.
9. When you both have grown distant- Call it quits!
Growing distant is a major loophole in any relationship. When you stop sharing and caring for each other, that indicates that you have grown distant. If you love each other, distance doesn’t matter. You won’t even grow distant. Do you get the difference?
But when there is a lack of love and care, couples grow apart. That is the time when you should decide whether to stay together or move out. A loveless and unhappy relationship also hinders your personal growth. That’s because it has a direct impact on your mental health.
10. Trust issues start lingering- Call it quits!
Trust is an important factor, isn’t it? So, if you come across trust issues in your relationship, you should speak to your partner about it. If you can resolve it, good, but if not, then you should look for a better resolution.
Trust issues can lead to major fallout in a relationship. You either solve it at the earliest or get entangled in it for a lifetime.
Summary
Relationship comes with a series of hurdles. It is the love and attachment toward each other that will keep you connected. However, many relationship experts advise that you should move away from the person whose actions don’t match their words. If someone promises you something but their actions speak otherwise, then you must not keep expecting affection from them. Give your spouse or partner the benefit of the doubt once or twice.
However repetitive occurrences of the same mistakes must not be ignored. Prioritize your feelings. Let not the other person hurt you frequently. Communicate with your partner, express your feelings, and let him know how you’ve been dealing with the stress resulting from his undesirable actions. If he understands and is willing to rectify his mistakes and love you even more deeply, then yes, you can stick around in this relationship. Or else, you better call it quits!
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