You may think if you find a man who has similar interests & life goals means you have found your partner. But how will you be sure that you have found the right partner? Of course, it is not easy, and there isn’t any rulebook that will help you find one. But after reading a couple of psychotherapist blogs and articles I have narrowed down a few tips that will help you choose the right partner for marriage.
First, you need to have the patience to find a partner and to analyze whether he fits your version of Mr. Right. Every woman has a picture of Mr. Right in her mind, and hence, you must not compare your perspective with that of others.
Here are the tips that you can use to choose the right partner to be your perfect life partner.
1. Check out what all points you have in common
Of course, as mentioned before, if you have similar life goals and interests, then it will be a plus point. But other than that, you must see whether your partner agrees with you on political and spiritual topics.
You need to ensure that you are always on the same page when it comes to regular topics. If there are differences, then you must know how to put forth your viewpoint without sounding rude or arrogant.
2. Look for someone who is not an addict. It is a crucial to tip to choose the right partner.
Addiction of any kind can prove dangerous to your relationship. Of course, a chain smoker, alcohol addict, or substance abuser is a big no-no. But there are some other addictions as well.
For instance, someone who has OCD of some kind, or loves to watch TV for straight three or four hours. Also, you will find some people who are addicted to perfection, they seek perfection in everything they do or take up.
So, if you pick up someone with such qualities, be ready to accept their flaws for life.
3. Pick someone who is easy to communicate to
You should feel free to talk to your partner. There should be no hesitance or restrictions on open communication. If you are scared to speak up about something to your partner, then you are not with the right man.
You should always feel at ease when you are sharing your experiences or thoughts with your partner. It is the correct way to choose the right partner. If in the initial stage itself you hold yourself back, imagine your future with such a man. You will always be afraid to open up.
4. Do not commit after three or four dates. Take a substantial amount of time to know your partner.
Some women commit immediately after a few days of dating. But ideally, you should never commit unless you are sure that you can spend the rest of your life with that man. Additionally, a few days of dating will never help you in learning whether your partner is the right one or not.
Take your time, judge your partner on his behavior, likes, and dislikes. Yes, judge your partner. Why do I say this? That’s because your partner will be judging you irrespective of what you feel or do for him. Date for a fair amount of time and then decide about commitment.
5. Make sure you find a partner who is empathetic, caring, and loving
Your partner must possess all the good qualities that will make him a good human being. But beware some people feign to be good humans and in reality, they are parasites. These days everybody knows how to get their jobs done by sycophancy.
So, you have to watch all the signs that will give you a hint that your partner is using you or not. The signs will help you choose the right partner. If your man is not feigning then it is a good sign, but you must also ensure that he respects and values your feelings.
6. Another best tip to choose the right partner- if your partner says something about himself, believe him.
Don’t be under the impression that when you will get together your partner will listen to you and behave according to your instructions. Instead, you listen to what your partner shares about his behavior.
For instance, if your partner says that he is obsessive about something or certain things aggravate his bad mood, then believe him. And do not pledge to change him. He will not, instead you will end up ruining your happy mental state.
7. See how you handle the disagreements
Another useful tip to choose the right partner, see how you talk to each other when you have minor disagreements. If your partner gets too aggressive to prove his point then you know he is not the right choice.
There has to be balanced communication when dealing with verbal fights. Both the partners must put forth their viewpoints and discuss them in detail. But the moment it turns into a heated argument, you should see how your partner handles himself.
8. You should always feel happy after meeting your partner
There is a certain level of excitement when you plan to meet your partner. But after you leave, you should feel the rush of a happy vibe in you. You will experience a happy vibe when your partner will make you laugh and have an exciting conversation with you.
Ideally, it is said that if you have a partner who has an amazing sense of humor, mean you have found a great match. It is just a tip to choose the right partner. But it is not necessary a person with great comic sense will be a good partner. He should be a good human being as well.
9. How well emotionally connected you are, this tip will definitely help you choose the right partner
Over time, you will develop strong connections with your man both emotionally and physically. But you have to check how your emotional connection is. It is not difficult to establish a strong physical connection.
But for the emotional connection, you may have to be able to bond well. This tip will surely help you choose the right partner. If you have established a strong emotional connection and you are happy to be together, then it is a sign that you have chosen a perfect partner.
10. Check if your partner wants to get hitched soon
There is nothing wrong if your partner wants to marry you. But see how desperate he is to get married and why. The desperation will reveal the secrets. Some people have hidden agenda and hence, you may have to be careful when taking the final call.
Do not fall for any excuses. See for yourself, are the excuses valid enough? If not, then tell him you need some more time to give him commitment. Take all his explanation into account and then make the decision. Also, don’t forget, it is your life so choose wisely.