Independence doesn’t come free; you have to fight for it. And women have been fighting for too long in this patriarchal society. Maybe to prove their worth and gain acceptance to single life in the society women prefer to stay single today. The development of patriarchy began in the pre-historic era, somewhere around 4000 BCE. Back then women acquiesced to the unfavorable norms of society.
But now the times have changed, thanks to our women ancestors who fought for women’s rights. Some of the most renowned names are Alice Paul, Maud Wood Park, Mary McLeod Bethune, and Rose Schneiderman. Amongst the Indian women Savitribai Phule, Tarabai Shinde, Ramabai Ranade, and Dr. Vina Mazumdar are known for their astounding fighting spirits.
If you ask me how women think in today’s times and what they expect from their lives, maybe I won’t be able to give a definite answer. But yes, the reasons that make women stay single these days stem from their experiences.
They Do Not Wish to Compromise on Their Freedom
Women have always faced opposition to living a life of their choice. Only the family that believed in high values in terms of humanity allowed women to have a life of their choice. But educating girls in yesteryears was never a part of the culture.
Society believed that men must earn bread and women must take care of the children and do the chores. After several decades this trend started to decline. Women realized the importance of having money at their disposal. Hence, if they wish to do something of their choice, they must keep others from entering their space. You need to value and protect your freedom to prevent making compromises as per the unwanted expectations of society.
Want to Focus on Their Careers
Have you read the story of Sudha Murthy, where she wrote a letter to JRD Tata on why only male candidates were eligible to apply for the post of engineer at TELCO? Oh, you must read it! Her contributions in the field of social services are phenomenal but her fighting spirit is remarkable.
She got married at the age of 27, but during her bachelorette days, she worked with immense diligence and continues to work even today. These days women set targets to prosper and measure their success. At least I like to analyze how fast is my progress and how I should improve to maximize the pace. Women prefer to stay single because they do not like to get encumbered with other responsibilities. They wish to avoid the tasks that may slow down their progress and distract them from their goals.
Do Not Believe in the Institution of Marriage
Yes, that’s right! Not just men, even some women do not believe in holy matrimony. There is nothing wrong with the concept of marriage. But the way the couples are forced to live post-marriage is the main issue. There is a need to alter various social norms to let the married couples live a happy life. (I do not wish to specify the norms, as we all are aware of them).
But I certainly believe many practices are a part of the culture and tradition and hence, discarding them altogether isn’t a feasible option. That’s the reason why many women prefer to stay single all their lives instead of falling prey to disappointing traditions.
Had Bad Romantic Relationships in the Past
I believe every relationship has its ups and downs but some relationships are toxic. Human beings who face horrible encounters in relationships often give up on looking for a new relationship. So, for obvious reasons women facing dominance from the outside world do not seek love again.
Maybe that’s why many women prefer to stay single and live life on their terms. Why seek peace elsewhere, when the peace lies within? And why allow someone else to destroy happiness and ruin mental health? Maybe, they might be contemplating this way in terms of leading a life in a new direction.
Want to Live an Adventurous Life
Education broadens your outlook towards life. Many educated women understand the importance of traveling and exploring the world. Women who feel that being single will always allow them to put their desires first, often hate monotonous life.
The nitty-gritty of being in a relationship or being married differs from person to person. And when the wavelengths match the relationship flourishes. But if there is a severe imbalance in the thinking capacity of two individuals the bonding goes sour. For instance, if the woman likes visiting exotic locations, and the man doesn’t like traveling at all, where do you think is the relationship going? Obviously, it won’t work!
Women Prefer to Stay Single Because They Like to Be in Charge of Their Life
Studies show that women are better at decision-making than men. That’s because women mature faster than men. So, when it comes to planning for their lives, then why not? Deciding how to design their own life is not only their right but also an opportunity to be different than other meek women.
If you take a look at the leading companies today, a majority of them have female CEOs running the business. Susan Wojcicki- CEO of YouTube, Lisa Su- CEO of AMD, Ginni Rometty- CEO of IBM are one of the few names that clear the air. All these leaders knew they have the capability to make a difference and that influences the other women. Hence, that’s why many women prefer to stay single to design their lives uniquely.
Aim to Break the Stereotype
Have you read the wage distribution statistics? The numbers show that there is a wide gender pay gap in different parts of the world. Several reasons come in support of this gap. Some of the factors that support this biased approach are education choices, work experience, preferred job profile, and maternity breaks during employment.
I believe these factors are irrational and disputable. That’s because when at work women give their 100% just like men do. There is no negative effect on their productivity irrespective of the hostile conditions. So, if there is no disruption in productivity then why is there a gender-based wage gap? Women are considered to be less productive than men. Maybe to break this generalization some women prefer to stay single and focus on their work.
Women Prefer to Stay Single Because They Have Different Sexual Preferences
We all know that it took ages for the LGBTQ community to get their rights approved by the law. At some places, the fight is still on. Every human being has the right to choose their sexual partner but since their preferences do not conform to societal rules, they choose not to make their choices public.
So, this also could be one of the reasons that women choose to stay single. It may not necessarily mean that women like going overboard and defying social norms. But yes, staying single empowers them to make decisions that are favorable to them.
Haven’t Met the Man Who’s Appreciative
To be together you need to have respect for each other. Some men are challenging but not open-minded. Egoistic men do not like challenging women and that’s where they start generalizing the women.
A man is a good partner when he admires his woman for her work and dedication. The (female) partner’s success never causes demoralization in them. But when women do not find such suitable partner, they choose to go for a man who isn’t intimidated by their progress. Or they prefer to avoid complicated relationships. And hence, women prefer to stay single these days.
Women Prefer to Stay Single Because They Want to Prove Themselves to the World
Women are asked to prove themselves at every stage in their life. If you talk about being hired for a higher designation, her capabilities are questioned. Unlike men, they are never assigned a role based on their qualifications and experience.
First women face abnormal judgements because of their gender. Then their education and work experience are considered. So, women who are on a proving-themselves spree will never give up on their ambitions. And as per my experience, it is far easier to set a mark, if you are single.
Haven’t Met Someone with Similar Life-goals
We all have heard a saying that life is a bicycle and in order to keep it balanced, you need two wheels to keep it moving. But I beg to differ in a certain way. Of course, you need two wheels to keep moving but you need wheels of similar dimensions.
What I mean to say is, wheels of different sizes cannot function effectively. Hence, people with similar life goals need to stay together. If one is over-ambitious and the other is not, it may create rifts between them. Also, people who have similar goals often support each other. And women who do not meet a partner who shares a similar mindset, choose to stay single.
Women Prefer to Stay Single Because They Gain Emotional Stability
Louisa May Alcott, Florence Nightingale, Queen Elizabeth I, and Oprah Winfrey are some of the famous personalities we know. But do you have any idea what is the common thread that links them? They all chose to stay single.
I believe every human being seeks emotional stability. Marriage and complicated relationships never offer you mental peace. There is a firm belief that a decluttered mind facilitates you to focus 100% on your work. Maybe that’s why women prefer to stay single even today.
Conclusion
Why is it so difficult for people to believe that even women can stay single? They have the right to choose a path of their choice. A life partner does not necessarily complete a woman. It’s the freedom and the power to make decisions, that completes her.
We all must come to terms, that if men can stay single if they wish to, then even women can! It is not about comparisons with different genders, but an individual preference of living a life a certain way. I must specify if you wish to stay single all your life irrespective of gender, it’s your call. Don’t let others’ lame opinions discourage you or make you indecisive.
