It is not easy to stay humble and peaceful in this chaotic world. But you have to practice patience and humility to keep your bonds strong with your loved ones. Using some hurtful words in a relationship can destroy the core of your love life. And you must avoid using them when you are on the verge of getting into an ugly quarrel.
How many of you have apologized immediately after an atrocious verbal fight with your partner? Nobody does. You seek some time to be in a quiet place and then think over what went wrong and why you should not be the one to bow down, right? But the reality is, the moment you hurl abusive words or use foul language, you have already stained the relationship.
But here’s a little help that can save you from destroying your healthy bond.
Never say these ten destructive phrases. Making use of such hurtful words in a relationship can aspirate the essence of your bonding.
1. “Do you really have brains? Oh, that is probably the reason why you couldn’t make it through high school.”
I know a majority of the partners use this phrase to make their other partners feel inferior. But what is the point of using such phrases? It will only make them feel sub-standard and lose respect for you.
You will be at a loss once your partner loses respect for you. There won’t be the same level of understanding that you had before. Love in the relationship will start vanishing. Also, if you knew your partner was of low standard, then why did you marry or get into a relationship with her?
When you call your partner low standard, you are insulting yourself. How? That’s because you chose them to be your partner. You are indirectly disrespecting your own choice. Think about it before you use such hurtful words in a relationship.
2. “If you aren’t happy with me, then why don’t you divorce me?”
This phrase can jolt your partner. It is advisable, no matter how bad the situation may be, never use this phrase. You have to understand every relationship has some problems. Some problems are fixable, while others are those you have to live with.
Accepting the reality and trying to resolve the problems by communicating and discussing can help a lot. But parting ways is not a solution. Even if you had no intention of getting a divorce from your partner, you still said those words, and that can wreak havoc in your marriage. You may have to live with your partner in several months of rancorous disputes on the use of this phrase.
3. “Why did I marry you? It is the worst mistake of my life.”
If you are not married and you say- Getting into a relationship with you is the worst mistake of my life can also ruin a flourishing bond. First and foremost, even if you feel this way, you should not be saying it upfront.
You can destroy someone’s mental health. Never use these destructive phrases that ruin a strong relationship. If you aren’t happy with someone, then talk about it to your partner. Find a way out. Why abuse or use cuss words? It doesn’t help; it only worsens the matter.
4. “Why don’t you just keep your filthy mouth shut?”
Disagreements can turn ugly if you bring the past instances into the present argument. And the verbal spat can worsen if you overuse abusive language. Furthermore, many couples do not draw a line when it comes to arguing.
Most of them go overboard and ruin the happy bonding. One of the destructive phrases that ruin a strong relationship is the repetitive use of – “Shut up!” It is a sign that you do not want to continue with the argument, and you don’t want to hear out the other person. Result? The problem is left unresolved, leading to the build of toxicity.
5. “Will you please stop being my mom?”
Are you a nagging wife? If yes, then you may have heard your partner saying this phrase many times. Most of the henpecked husbands start showing no concern for their partner after a few years of marriage. The only reason that defines such behavior is complacency.
And the women forget to understand that their respective spouses are adults. Treat them like adults and lay the responsibility on them. Let them know how it feels to be overburdened with responsibilities. It will help you to stop nagging, and your man will learn from his mistakes.
6. “You are getting worse than your mom/dad.”
No, it is not similar to the above phrase. It is one of the worst destructive phrases that many couples use to refer to their nasty in-laws. First and foremost, not all in-laws are bad, they are just over-protective of their children.
But when you use a reference to your in-laws in an argument, you fuel the fire. And post that, it just gets worse. There is no point in letting your past experiences with your in-laws have room for disagreement. Instead, stick to the topic and look for solutions.
7. “Is there any harsher word than hate, because I have got a similar feeling for you now. I just hate you.”
When you leave a fight or disagreement unresolved, then you are bound to build toxicity in your mind. Toxicity can get worse if you do not open up to your partner. “I hate you” is one of the destructive phrases that ruin a strong relationship without you even noticing it.
Additionally, the more frequently you use this phrase, the more speedily you will lose feelings for your partner. Eventually, this leads to a divorce or separation. Unless you have become used to being submissive and complacent to your critical spouse.
8. “Oh, you are an imbecile! Why should I ask your opinion?” Such hurtful words in a relationship will demoralize your partner
Loosely translated- you are an idiot, and your views will be as worthless as you. A majority of the women face this remark when their spouses are the breadwinners. That is the reason every woman must be financially independent.
When you use this phrase, you are ideally letting your partner feel inferior to you. It is also a remark that can be damaging. And your wife or partner can be demoralized to a large extent. Why use such destructive phrases that ruin a strong relationship? I believe you should never use such phrases even as a part of a joke.
9. “Why does it even bother you?” Never say these hurtful words in a relationship
Let’s say your partner has been coming home late, and you stay awake all night waiting for him. And your partner comes to you and says- why are you awake, why can’t you just go to bed without waiting for me?
You don’t have to worry about me. I will come home when I want to. You need not bother. How does it sound? Disturbing, doesn’t it? So, such words erupt fights and quarrels. Obviously, no one has asked you to stay awake, but if you do it out of concern, then your effort must be appreciated, right? When you feel left out, the feelings start to diminish.
10. “Don’t use your brain, either way, you don’t have it!” Why say such hurtful words in a relationship?
How does it feel when someone says this? Insulting, does it not? But why do you have to make your partner feel inferior? You have to accept that human beings cannot hide feelings. And you must value those feelings if they are for you out of concern.
Keep your ego aside and value the bond you share. Ripping out the essence of bonding will lead to a disaster. Solve your problems amicably and spread love and joy.