“I wish I had someone to share my feelings with.” “How come others find their match, and I don’t?” “Oh God, how long do I have to wait to find my life partner?” I know these questions hit you hard when you are living a single life and longing for a loving partner. I do agree that dating these days is not just vexing but emotionally draining as well. Somewhere you slide through the negative stream and develop toxic thoughts. That’s Okay! Everybody goes through this stage when one is single. However, these negative thoughts must not consume you, hence, this blog focuses on sharing the right dating tips for people in their 30s.
These dating tips for people in their 30s will lay some grounds to find you the right match
1. Do Not Sound Desperate in Your First Meeting
Yes, you are in your early 30s or late 30s and you are bound to be desperate. But sounding like one will kill your potential chances of meeting the right match. People judge you immediately once you open up about your loneliness.
That’s wrong on their part to judge you, but you can’t help it (call it human tendency). Even if they are desperate to find a partner they will still judge you for being over-enthusiastic. So, play by the rules, and stay calm and collected, this is one of the best dating tips. Respond diplomatically, do not give out all the information in one go.
2. Jot Down Your Relationship Expectations
This will help you a lot to find the right partner. Making notes about your expectations from a relationship will give you a clear understanding of what you want from your partner. It will save your time and effort when meeting someone for the first time.
You’ll have your questionnaire ready and the answers from your date will give you a clear picture of where the relationship will head. Also, it will save you from unwanted emotional drama.
3. Avoid Comparisons with your Friends’ Love Life
When you are in your 30s most of your friends are either married or are in live-in relationships. So, it’s obvious that you’ll start wondering why you are still single and when you’ll get a partner.
Also, once you get a partner do not set high standards by comparing to your friends’ relationships. Every relationship is different, and so will be yours. So, take it slow, and do not frown if you find something displeasing. Remember these dating tips to avoid complications.
4. Communication is the Key
Dating is all about how you conduct and express yourself. The way you expect your partner to open up, likewise, even your partner will have similar expectations. Let each other know about your goals and objectives.
Furthermore, if you see any flaws, clear them up upfront. Talk, discuss, and open up to clear the air. In simple terms, if you don’t like something about your date, let them know. The more distinctly you communicate, the easier it will get to learn about each other.
5. Fix the Courtship Period
Come on let’s face it! Many people date for a relatively long time. They never fix a time frame for how long to date. It is necessary to fix the courtship period. What if you date for a couple of years and you fall apart. In that process, you not only waste time but you lose opportunities to date another prospective match.
I believe if you are looking for a committed relationship and your partner wants to date you for a couple of months, then decide a specific period. Six months or eight months is sufficient time to know or discover things about each other. According to many married couples, no specific time would suffice to learn about each other. Even after being married for 10 or 20 years, they discover different traits about their partners.
So, all in all, you can’t waste your time dating for a longer period. Stick to a plan, if you find that it’s the right time to disclose your decision, then do it. If it’s favorable then get hitched, if not then move on and look for another date. Isn’t this one of the best dating tips?
6. No Need to Compromise Unnecessarily
Just because you have been single for a long time, doesn’t mean you should give in easily. It’s your life and you live only once. So, instead of settling down for something unworthy, better you stay single. It’s my honest opinion.
I say that because some people are complete trash, they don’t value others’ feelings. What if you discover some unbearable shortcomings in your date? Will you settle for one your whole life? It isn’t easy, trust me. So, this is one of the most important dating tips, do not compromise on anything that you find isn’t worthy enough to make the sacrifice.
7. Show Compassion and Empathy About Their Past Life
If your date tells you how bad their past life was, then show some humanity. You’ll receive it back. It’s a good sign if your date opens up about their past life. It indicates that they wish to start a new relationship on a clean slate.
In addition to this, it will be nice of you to open up about yours as well. One thing is that you’ll get a topic to break the ice, and the other is that you’ll get relaxed upon learning that everybody’s life has some problems. Say some kind words, show how empathetic you are, and how good-natured human you can be.
8. Do Not Let Anyone Play with Your Emotions
Some boyfriends have a habit of misusing the feelings of their girlfriends to their advantage. But since you have already crossed the tender age, you might be wiser to discern the tricks. With age comes wisdom, hence, stay alert when someone is trying to trick you into doing undesirable things.
For instance, if you are already involved with your boyfriend, he might take advantage of your emotions to get laid. Emotionally blackmailing you or giving you some hope are weird tricks that men play to get physical. So, just beware! Keep these dating tips in mind and don’t fall for such perverts.
9. Know their Sexual Orientation Before Dating
This is one of the crucial dating tips and has to be followed in the initial stage itself. It is of prime importance to know whether you are looking for a heterosexual or homosexual partner. If you discover any foul play later, you’ll be heartbroken.
And that will take away your enthusiasm to date other prospective matches. I admit that it isn’t easy to make out the sexual orientation of a person because some people do not like disclosing it. But that’s wrong, if you are looking for a long-term commitment, then they have to be clear about their sexual preferences. And that applies to you as well.
10. Avoid Passing Judgement Instantly- One of the dating tips for people in 30s that should be followed every time.
There will be instances where you will experience or hear many things for the first time. That may include your date’s employment issues, financial crisis, family problems, social issues, etc. Whatever it be, do not let your opinions be known to them.
It might be weird at first, but if you open up and pass any judgment, you’ll be seen in poor taste. Women especially should be clear with this dating tip. Most of them pass judgment immediately by comparing the issues with theirs. Don’t do that, be polite!
11. Visit Different Places to Meet New People- It is one of the dating tips for people in 30s that is most overlooked
Do not rely on social networking sites to meet new people. Explore other places as well. You can join a gym or register yourself in a dance club or sports club. You can also do some volunteering jobs in your spare time. Or you can go to local bookstores and cafes to find people of similar interest.
Sitting at home and wondering about how to find an ideal partner won’t help. You must actively initiate meeting new people for better results. Make sure you select places where you can find people who practice similar hobbies. That way you may instantly hit it off and start dating.
12. Make Use of Dating Apps but Do Not Go Overboard
Of course, another ideal option to find a date is making use of dating apps. It may sound like one of the most promising dating tips but you can get over-excited with its use. That’s because you’ll find multiple matches and you’ll be tempted to go on multiple dates.
This may take your attention away from your objective of dating. If you are in your mid-30s, you shouldn’t be dating multiple people all at once. You won’t find the right match if you are looking for a long-term relationship.
Or in some cases if you want to date to get married then dating multiple people at a time isn’t a good option. It may turn out to be a waste of time and if either of your partners finds out you are double dating, then you’ll get into trouble.
Additionally, you must get the right dating app. Various dating apps serve the right purpose. For instance, ‘Bumble’ is best for confident women, ‘Hinge’ is best for those seeking serious relationships, ‘Her’ is best for LGBTQ, ‘Happn’ is best for missed connections, and ‘eHarmony’ is best for people who wish to get married soon. Make the best use of these apps but do not raise your expectations.
13. Discuss with Your Friends but Do Not Let Out All the Details
Just because you are inexperienced in dating, you’ll ask for tips from your friends. And eventually, you’ll discuss everything that happens on a date. It’s fine if you disclose every detail to your confidants, but don’t reveal it among your common friends.
It may not seem important to you but your partner won’t like it. Also, your common friends will start having opinions about you and their views will disappoint you. At first, this may sound ridiculous to you but ask friends who always get belittled.
14. Protect your Emotional Stability- One of the crucial dating tips for people in 30s that is often ignored
When you are in your mid-30s or late-30s and still single, it is obvious that you’ll be indecisive while dealing with relationship matters. It’s fine, it takes time to adjust to the new changes in life and dealing with emotional turbulence.
All you need to do is let your partner know how you feel. Do not ignore your feelings. Exchange every thought that passes through your mind related to your relationship. If there’s something on your mind that is bothering you, let your partner know.
Dating is all about learning and discovering each other. Do not suppress yourself. Quelling your emotions will lead to disastrous outcomes in the future. It’s one of the most important dating tips, do keep in mind.
15. Spare Time for Yourself- One of the useful dating tips for people in 30s
Take time to enjoy yourself as well. Do not get engrossed in dating. Once in a while chill and relax somewhere alone. Just enjoy your “me time”. Sparing time for yourself will help you to analyze where your relationship is going.
This will also help you to unwind yourself and get your focus back on track. Dating for a long time can make you dull and ambitionless. That’s because you’ll be in a phase where you just wish to settle down and start a new life. That’s okay if you feel this way. But that shouldn’t be at the expense of your feelings.
16. Talk About Sharing Expenses- Always Go Dutch
It’s simple, taking up responsibilities and earning bread and butter for the family comes after you get married. But while dating, you must share the expenses equally. Also, you get to learn whether your partner is willing to share the responsibilities or not.
Going Dutch in the initial stages itself will give you clarity about your relationship status. Not many men or women like to share the expenses, and that’s a sign, that in the future you’ll be the one who’ll be overburdened with the responsibilities. So, play it safe. It’s one of those dating tips that can’t be disregarded.
17. Do Not Attempt to Fix Your Partner, if they Lack Confidence- One of the important dating tips for people in 30s
After a couple of meetings, your partner may tell you that he isn’t confident about how he feels about you. If he has second thoughts then let him go. Do not try to convince him that you are great and you can manage to set things straight.
If someone lacks confidence, it’s their problem. You don’t have to put in extra effort just to get the relationship working. If you do it now, you may have to continue doing it for the rest of your life. Remember it takes two to tango.
18. Do Not Entertain Any Overnight Stay Calls
If it’s been a couple of times that you have met your partner, then you might develop some trust in them. But do not give a positive response if you see the signs or receive an invitation for an overnight stay. You may also face this situation if you leave late from a romantic dinner date and are a bit drunk.
You may be given options and weird reasons to stay for a night but ignore them and head to your place. Whatever the reason be, just do not entertain any night plans. That will be good for you if you are looking for a long-term relationship. Also, you must have heard your granny say, that nothing good happens after 2 Am.
19. Keep Away From Social Media- One of the handy dating tips for people in 30s
You know that social media keeps a tab on you. But you must avoid posting your dating stuff on your social media profile. It’s just for your good, why do you want people to know whom you’ve been dating and why did you break up? Or why did you get a new boyfriend?
It’s your personal life, keep it private. The world doesn’t need to know the intimate details. All they do is enjoy and make fun of you. So, keep your personal life a mystery on social media.
20. Real Love isn’t a Myth- It Exists. Just be Yourself
You’ll experience whether it’s true love or not only when you find the right match. For some, it’s an easy guess. Their mindsets match, their hobbies match, their goals match, and they share a strong positive vibe for each other.
Your instincts will tell you whether the person is the right match or not. All you have to do is be yourself. Do not feign to be someone that you are not. You cannot pretend all your life. You just need to have an open approach, be your true self. If someone has to love you, they will love you back.
Conclusion
The dating trends are ever evolving. The trick is to keep ourself well-versed about the dating culture. Try getting familiar with the dating lexicon as well. The digital age has changed how humans think and how they respond to new changes in the dating front.
Avoid feigning and keep an open mind. Welcome the views of the other person as well. If you do not like something just keep your views before them politely. Enjoy the dating vibes and go with the flow. You will find the right match soon.
