Ideally, I don’t believe in the fact that you cannot repair anything (of course, in terms of love and relationships). If you are willing to go to any extent to get your love back, then you can repair your relationship. However, it may take a lot of sacrifice and compromises from your end. But if things have gone beyond your control, then yes, it becomes next to impossible to fix the ruined relationship. It means your relationship is tainted and irreparable.
Many believe that building a relationship requires two-way efforts. If only one partner is struggling to keep the relationship alive, then there is no point. The inputs have to be from both ends. But how can you learn that you are in a tainted relationship that is irreparable?
Well, here are a few signs that will give you a clear picture of what your relationship looks like. And then you can decide for yourself whether you wish to repair it or let it go.
Your relationship is tainted- what does it even mean?
In simple terms, a tainted relationship means that somehow your aggressive behavior or lack of communication with your partner (and vice versa) has rendered rifts in your bonding. There could also be other reasons including violence and cheating. But the intensity of negativity is so high that it leads to frequent verbal spats and aggravates hatred towards your partner.
Now let’s have a look at the signs that can help you understand the nature of your relationship with your partner.
1. There is way too much toxicity in your relationship
The first sign of tension in your relationship is that you cannot stand each other for too long. The mere presence of your partner annoys you. If you think about discussing something, you immediately give out a negative expression.
Also, whenever your partner speaks, you turn a cold shoulder and shrug off his positive advances. You try to pick out the negative aspects of his suggestions or advice. You just don’t like to pay attention to your partner’s views and opinions. That’s where the toxicity keeps building up.
2. You cannot feel the same kind of attachment as before
How often do you think you are still connected with your partner? Is it on an emotional level or a physical level? If your answer is- no connection at all, then you know that your relationship is tainted and irreparable.
When you feel nothing for your partner, then how will you stay with him? You require attachment to keep the relationship flourishing. But when there is none, you are just living with a ‘known stranger’, or you call him an acquaintance.
3. Recurrence of Breakup- One of the crucial signs that your relationship is tainted
Breakup and patch-up are very common in a healthy relationship. It is even healthier if you resolve the problems and forgive your partner soon. The more you delay in responding to your partner’s requests, the more you endanger your relationship.
But if you keep breaking up now and then, and never apologize to each other, then it is a sign that you still hold grudges against your partner. And when the next fight takes place, you break up again. Maybe you patch up but not with an intention to mend the damage. Only to go back to your state of being a nagger.
4. You are afraid to confront your partner
Has it ever occurred to you that you avoid asking your partner for an explanation for his wrongdoings? If that is the case, then either you are sure that your partner is never going to admit his mistakes, or you don’t care enough to ask him for an explanation.
It may be because you know if you ask him, he will either yell at you or avoid the topic. Or he will just give you some condescending reply. So, you prefer staying aloof from him. Well, it is a sign that your relationship is tainted and irreparable.
5. Now you picture the future without your partner- Another sign that reflects your relationship is tainted
Okay, let’s go back into the past and see how you had planned your life. Did you have some amazing future plans together? What were your plans in terms of raising your kids? Did you see yourself spending your old life in peace with your partner?
Well, what do you see now? Is your partner in your plans now? Or have you already started to picture a beautiful future without your partner? Well, it is a sign that you do not want to be in the relationship anymore. That is the reason why you don’t want your partner in your life in the upcoming years.
6. None of you wants reconciliation
Have you ever thought of visiting a counselor or an expert? If you wish to rebuild your relationship, you must seek professional help. But what if you don’t want to be with your partner anymore? You have given enough time to set things straight, but things didn’t go in your favor.
So, you have given up hope, and now you do not wish to get back together. Also, you have a strong gut feeling that you should not reconcile. Hence, you decide not to seek anyone’s help. And my dear friend, it is a sign that your relationship is tainted and irreparable.
7. You do not want to put in effort to restore the relationship
Once you start living a dull life or talk to your friends about how boring your life is with your partner, you will get some advice and suggestions. But the question is, are you willing to make the effort to put things back together?
So, what do you do? You sit in a place and deliberate with yourself. And what is the result? You do not want to make the effort. Also, when you discuss restoring the relationship with your partner, even if he rejects the proposal upfront. It is a clear sign that none of you wants to restore the ruined relationship. And it clears the air that your relationship is tainted and irreparable better you both move on.
8. You both party or celebrate, but not with each other
Let’s take an example. You got a promotion at work, you organized a lavish party at a hotel, but you did not invite your partner. What does that mean? You do not want your partner to be a part of your success.
Furthermore, you have all your excuses ready in case somebody asks you about your partner. Without a doubt, you have no interest in continuing your life with your partner. It is a sign of failure, and your relationship is tainted and irreparable now.
9. Strangers under the roof- A new signboard for married couples
We all know after some time; every relationship goes through a stagnation point. And that is okay. But even when there is stagnancy, there is love and affection for each other. Every couple becomes complacent in a relationship.
But if you live like strangers under one roof, then your relationship has hit a dead-end. And by strangers, I mean you don’t talk at all, you don’t share stories of your day at work, you don’t care enough to ask each other how they are. Well, that’s when you can safely assume that you should not be staying together.
10. None of you is apologetic for wrong behavior- One of the worst signs your relationship is tainted
If you care for someone and you hurt them, you apologize later, right? But do you say sorry to your partner if you behaved wrongly? No, right? So, just because you are unapologetic, your partner may have also turned wicked like you.
And now you hurt each other on purpose but never apologize. Why do you even want to stay in such a toxic relationship? You should call it quits and move on. Seek love and a better life elsewhere. Do not stay stuck in a boring life.
Conclusion
There is always a hope to fix things that have suffered some setbacks. So in a way, you can fix the tainted relationships. All you have to do is talk to your partner. If your man is willing to cooperate to resolve the issue in the relationship then you have a second chance to fix it.
Make the best use of the second chance. However, even after several attempts to convince him of reconciliation, he is adamant about his views, you better part ways. Remember efforts need to be from both ends. Leave the past behind and move on for a better future.
