Relationships are to be preserved and cherished. Then why do you need to use silent treatment in a relationship? Is this what you are wondering? Well, many relationship experts suggest that if you wish to have a strong bond with your partner, you need to make him understand your value first. And if you receive bad treatment from your partner unintentionally, then you have to make him acknowledge his ill-treatment.
So, silent treatment in a relationship is a remedy to preserve your bond and help your partner understand your value. That does not mean you want to ill-treat your partner. You only want your partner to realize his mistake and treat you with respect thereon.
Also, how you use the silent treatment and in what situations matters a lot. You cannot misuse it to get things from your partner when he is not willing to pay for them. So, to answer the question- is silent treatment a good idea? I would say yes if you are using it for a good purpose and not misusing it to get yourself pampered with expensive gifts.
You may also need to note that this idea will work only if your partner loves you. If he already had an intention to make you feel bad so that you go silent for a while, then the idea won’t work for you.
How most couples use silent treatment in a relationship but make sure that they do not misuse it.
Note: Communication is the key to a happy relationship. The more you open up about how you feel to your partner, the stronger bond you will build. However, sometimes it becomes necessary to go silent. So try to avoid crossing the limits when giving silent treatment to your partner.
1. Avoid Eye Contact
Oh yes, when you avoid looking at somebody when they are expecting you to look at them, it hurts a lot. Your feelings and desires get crushed. It makes the other person feel that he has made some mistake that got you to lose interest in looking at him.
It brutally hurts your feelings, but it leaves a massive impact on the other person’s mind. For instance, if your partner said some unacceptable things about you to his friends in your presence, then give him a cold gaze. He will notice it, but if he is smart enough, then he will speak something good about you to cover up the hurtful information he shared.
If that doesn’t work instantly, then avoiding eye contact while talking to him for a long time will do the job. Let him keep guessing what wrong he did.
2. Keep your communication to a minimum
It is an easy option to show your man that he has ill-treated you. And in most cases, it works wonders. If your man truly loves you, he will get depressed vibes from you. He may try to re-establish the good vibes between you two. Also, he will make an effort to cheer you up.
If that suffices, then you should give up the silent treatment and make him understand his mistake. Do not go overboard. It may ruin your relationship. Your primary intention must be to save your relationship and be in a loving bond again.
3. Pretend he does not exist for you
You need to be a good actor if you wish this idea to work in your favor. Guess you got to take some acting classes online (free ones of, course). Okay, jokes apart. Feigning may not be easy but, you can manage to do it if he desperately wants to talk to you.
Take some time to pretend and then tell him why you were giving him a hard time. Make him understand his mistake; avoid yelling and using cuss words. Ideally, communication and a brief discussion with your partner can do the job. But he will not understand the depth of your pain. So, the silent treatment can help you out.
4. Give cold replies or just shrug your shoulder
Suppose, your partner is looking for something important and he cannot find it, he will come running to ask you where he misplaced the thing. So, what will you do? You can either shrug your shoulders or give sour replies. Or you can also give one-word replies- yes, no, okay, etc.
Always remember you need to be in control of your emotions as well if you want silent treatment to work in your favor. Just don’t go overboard. You are attempting this idea to make your partner realize his mistake. It should not sever the strong ties.
5. Tell him you are busy if he demands your attention
Your partner may turn demanding if you aren’t giving him enough attention. So, if he keeps bothering you with texts or calls then tell him you are busy or just drop a bland message saying, you will be available only when you get free.
But when you get free, message him that you aren’t available to talk for a long time, so you drop him a message. Your indifferent behavior will trigger his anxiousness and will make him think about why you are acting strange.
If your partner approaches you with questions, answer him and tell him why you are upset. Let him know his mistake and forgive him if he feels sorry for his wrongdoing. Do not stretch the matter to extreme lengths.
6. Stick to a no-reply policy
You can use this extreme idea when you have been hurt way too much. You want to express yourself but you lack words and yet you want your man to feel your pain. So, you can go without talking to him.
Once your partner realizes that he has done something wrong, he will try to console you. Express yourself in clear words. Share with him what made you feel bad and why you chose not to reply. If he loves you, he will understand, and if not, then maybe it is your bad luck.
7. Enjoy with your friends and don’t include him
Another option to show your partner that you are badly hurt is by enjoying yourself. Go out, and party with your friends, but don’t invite your partner. Let him learn on his own why he was not invited.
If he still doesn’t understand why you are mad at him, he will never understand your feelings either. So, make it obvious from your behavior that he has been hurting you for a while, and you have chosen to enjoy yourself without him. See how he reacts.
8. Silent treatment in a relationship to show him your self-esteem is higher than his
Of course, it is necessary to keep yourself higher than anybody else. Be it your partner or your friends, over some time people start taking you for granted. So, you have to make them understand why they should respect you and your feelings.
Especially, your man has to understand that you are also a human being. You have also got feelings, so when it hurts, it is painful. Mental pain is more exhausting than physical pain. So, you have to value yourself over others.
That does not necessarily mean that you should belittle people and be unkind to them. Be an altruist but never let anyone play with your emotions, not even your partner.
9. Distance yourself- no affectionate feelings. Such form of silent treatment in a relationship may ruin the bond, so be careful
Isn’t it obvious? You have to show no intimacy to your partner when you are hurt. Just stay away from him as far as possible. Show him that you don’t want to get close to him. He does not deserve your love.
Okay, these are just some actions, you should not go deeper into this. Only on a superficial basis, act like you don’t care about him anymore. If he cares enough, he will understand your emotions, and if not, then you better go on a strike- no hugging, no peck on the cheek, and no touching.
10. Don’t rush into anything- let him admit his mistakes. Silent treatment in a relationship works but you should not force yourself on your partner
On a final note, don’t impose yourself on him. Let him understand why you are upset. It will be better if he gets it on his own. You telling him that he hurt you long back, won’t work. Also, if you keep bickering, he will ignore it.
Better practice patience, but show him through your actions that you are mad at him. Once he acknowledges his wrongdoing, you can forgive him.
