The love dynamics have been evolving at an erratic rate. How do you think men are coping with such a fast-paced life? They are saddled with unreal and unusual expectations from society and their loved ones. Men may not be expressing the pressure they have been under these many decades, but it is high time we address their concerns. Expectations from men in a relationship should be mutual and reasonable.
This blog will delve into the varied forms of expectations from men that either help them develop a successful love life or lose themselves under the societal norms levied.
Let’s Understand What Are Expectations In A Relationship
Firstly, expectations encompass a wide array of aspects, including financial contribution, communication, commitment, and emotional support. The upbringing of an individual, cultural background, and religious beliefs are some of the common factors that influence the expectations we have of men.
No two individuals can have similar expectations in a given situation. However, you may come across certain similarities in the expectations from men in a relationship that we are forced to accept and follow by external forces. There have been instances where men took adverse steps to end the trauma. Depression in men has been on the rise. So, how do you think we can put an end to such a rigid mentality?
Before that, let’s have a look at the list of expectations from men in a relationship
1. To be the provider
The most dreaded expectation from men is to provide for their family and loved ones. Support the education of their children, be available with funds in times of emergency, and be stashed with voluminous amounts of money to pay at any given time.
Yes, it has been a normal practice for generations but for how long do you think this should continue? It is time we lighten their burden and allow them to get some breather. Let’s stop asking men to be the provider. Such expectations from men in a relationship should be altered to a large extent.
Of course, some men like to take the charge of providing for their family. But this ideology should not be levied upon all the men in general. Ladies take charge of your life and stop asking men to be the providers.
2. To take a lead
Yeah, people have this concept imbibed in themselves that men must lead in a crisis. Why? Aren’t they human beings? Unless a man genuinely wants to push his limits in learning how well he can manage incorrigible situations, you must not compel him to take the lead.
Men are often asked to build a protective barrier for their families and be under constant pressure to pretend that they are fearless. But believe me, every human being on this earth lives under some fear throughout their life. We just expect men to be tough and level-headed in all situations. I certainly feel that is inhumane of us.
3. To suppress dejection
Society always preferred women to express their feelings openly, whether shedding tears or expressing views in public. Of course, no one stopped men from expressing themselves but people expect them to don a poker face in the civic space.
You may not have seen men weeping or expressing sob stories publicly or even among their loved ones. Of late, men have learned to let go of such inhibitions of suppressing themselves. But it has been instilled in us to avoid showing real emotions in the presence of a crowd. Men have always been under such pressure.
4. To hustle without complaining
Of course, everyone needs to work to win bread and butter. However, men are asked not to complain because they are the providers. How fair is this? Expectations from men in a relationship are not limited to this, they are also asked to ignore their mental health while fulfilling their duties toward their family.
Some blessed men have a caring family and a loving partner. But not all men enjoy the blessings of having a blissful life. If a man is willingly working to provide for his family, his partner, and all his family members must take care of his mental health.
5. To have a perfect masculine build
We all agree that women are the victims of such expectations to have a Barbie-like figure and a toned body. But men are also the victims of such cruel expectations from their partners. Not all men fall prey to such demands, but some work harder to achieve a bulky build to look more masculine.
Let’s also understand that some men work out for themselves and not because of some pressure. However, studies have shown that men have moved to body-building and resorted to protein intakes to build a perfect physique to avoid their partner’s complaints.
6. To be docile
Training and educating children to be obedient was not enough, now we want our partners to be obeying orders. Not generalizing all men. Some men like to be obedient and submissive. But most partners and spouses force their men to be docile.
Some men obey their partners out of fear of rejection from the society. While some follow the command of their partner because they love them unconditionally. You see people take advantage of their good behavior and kindness. So, it is time we all put an end to such behavior where we force men to behave like trained animals.
7. To have a luxurious life
Men are not just expected to earn but are also forced to have a luxurious life irrespective of their earning capacity. Either the partner compels to get luxury goods or the kids demand expensive toys. No one considers the income of the man before expecting a luxurious life.
Here, even if the man of the house wants to have a peaceful life without falling for any demands, he still has to earn beyond his capability to make ends meet. That is where the mental health of working-class men takes a hit. This is also one of the reasons men suffer from cardiac arrest at an early age.
8. To pay the bills every time
Isn’t this quite obvious? If we expect men to slog all day without complaining, then why can’t we make them pay all the expensive bills? Whether on a date or a vacation, we expect men to make the payments. Irrespective of the amount, men are always under an obligation to settle the expensive bills.
Some couples go the Dutch way, but in most cases, you will observe that the partner pays one-fourth of the amount and the man pays the three-fourth. It is completely acceptable if the man is willingly spending on his partner. However, it is not applicable in most cases. Many times there is an obligation for men to pay every time.
9. To be available any time you need
Expecting your man to be emotionally available is not wrong. But it may not be possible for him to make himself available every time. There has to be an understanding between the partners in terms of making themselves available to each other.
Some women are way too demanding. A slight indisposition makes them call out to their partner. However, a medical emergency is an altogether different situation, but some women seek attention from their partners 24*7 without any reason.
10. To project their masculinity- One of the silliest expectations from men in a relationship
You may be wondering how can one expect a partner to project masculinity. Well, either they want them to grow a beard or carry themselves in a classy or stylish way to flaunt their masculinity. Some partners also demand buying expensive SUVs and accessories that will augment their partner’s manliness.
Social media has all the suggestions and recommendations that play with your mind and make you demand unwanted stuff from your man. Of course, the digital world is the culprit but it is also your dormant conscience that makes you behave eccentrically. Making you have unrealistic demands from your man.
Coming back to the question- How to put an end to such unrealistic expectations from men in a relationship?
First and foremost, accept that men are also human beings. Treat them accordingly. Ask yourself, will you be able to fulfill the demands, if the same were expected from you? Set your goals straight and work on achieving them on your own. Try to figure out what is necessary and maintain a clutter-free life.
Expectations will never cease to end. They pile up more once your demands are fulfilled. Talk to your partner and discuss what you feel. If you have some expectations in terms of relationship issues bring them to the table. Work out a solution. Communication is the key.
The more you talk and share your problems the more your relationship is fortified. Seek professional help in dire situations. Have expectations but make sure they aren’t sucking the life out of your relationship.
